(Editor’s note: I do not yet know where it was stolen from, that is was stolen tonight, or even really that it was stolen. All I know is what’s in those two tweets. The unlocked bike was stolen from a city hall garage after the mayor rode it to work. The First Lady is “pissed.” In all seriousness, getting a bike stolen sucks. Condolences.)
Nigh half of one hour ago, our honorable leader sent this royal decree:
Seattle bicyclists, sharpen your gaze. You have been called upon to defend the honor of your fair city and find the fiend who has stolen from our brave mayoral family while they were busy defending us from a snow storm! If we cannot retrieve this fine steed, then our fine mayor’s wife will be forced to take the royal minivan, and I fear our civilization is not strong enough to keep from crumbling under such humility.
This is your time. Go out and defend Seattle’s honor!